Evelyn turns One

Dear Sweet Little Evie –
Today you are ONE! You have been mine for 365 days and they have been some of the best of my life. Your first year went by faster than Henry’s. I guess that’s to be expected when momma is chasing around your wild + energetic brother while also trying to enjoy your baby phase. When I was younger I would dream about having a little girl but as I grew into my twenties that changed and I thought I only wanted boys. That rang even truer once your brother was born. I totally wanted to be a boy mom, with a houseful of little guys running around wrestling each other and being the best of brothers. When I became pregnant with you, I even hoped you would be a boy. I found out you were not a boy when I had your 13 week ultrasound. I had no idea gender could be revealed that soon so I innocently asked the doctor if she “knew what it was.” Once I heard her say ‘it’s a girl!’ all those boy feelings immediately went away and were filled with bows, dresses and cute pink shoes. The excitement was overwhelming and I could not stop smiling. The first thing I did when I got home was pull out your brothers clothes I had saved and see if there were any gender neutral things I had. Thoughts of how I would decorate your nursery, the coming home outfit you would wear and other girly things filled my mind. I couldn’t wait to meet you.

The two favorite moments in my entire life was when I first met you and your brother. If I could go back in time to any day and relive it, those are the two days I would pick. There is no greater feeling than seeing your baby and hearing them cry for the first time. If there was one gift I could give to people, that would be it. No matter how many amazing places you have traveled or fun things you have experienced, I guarantee meeting your children tops them all. Even my wedding day is second to when I saw you and Henry for the first time. I hope you get to experience that one day. 

You treated me pretty well while you were in my belly, until the very last few weeks when you lodged your little body so high that you dislocated some cartilage from my rib cage. I spent time in the emergency room and slept sitting up for the last week. When you finally came {read about Evelyn’s birth story here} I felt like I was watching a movie in slow motion. It was nearly midnight, you came early, fast and unexpected. I had never experienced my water breaking and rushing to the hospital so the whole night was a whirlwind. Once the doctors brought you to me, I could not believe I had a daughter! You were the sweetest baby girl I had ever seen (totally biased I know) with the best demeanor. As you grew into your little self, your personality started to really shine. You totally go with the flow and let your brother take the lead. You love watching him talk and play and even let him chase you around sometimes. He is working on playing nice with you and you’ve been so patient while he learns to share and be gentle. I know you two are going to have such a great relationship. I think the reason walking has come so easily to you is because you want to keep up with Henry. You mastered walking before you were 10 months old. No falls, bruises or bumped heads. Pretty soon you will be chasing him around!

Last night when I laid your baby self down to sleep, I was flooded with emotions thinking of all the memories from this past year. How did all of these 365 days go by so fast? Why can’t I remember every second I have spent with you? If I could relive this year with you I would. I’d try to slow down time and treasure every moment we’ve shared. While I was pregnant with you I was worried I wouldn’t love you as much as I loved Henry. How could I possibly give love to another baby when your brother took up my whole heart? It’s safe to say that I never had trouble loving you. From the moment I first held you I fell in love. You have brought sweetness and balance to our family. Thank you for everything you have given us in your first year. It’s been such an honor being your mother.
“If I could give you one thing in life, I would give you the ability to see yourself through my eyes, only then would you realize how special you are to me. “

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